Ellettsville High School, Llamarada, 1949, Page 22

Description:	The main reason for the low crime rate in Indiana is Dan Webb, Chief of theSpencer Police Department. Not one single crime has been committed in the lastfifteen years that Dan couldnt solve. When a crime (which apparently can not besolved) is committed in any part of the state, Chief Webb is always called. Dansappointment to take the place of retired John Edgar Hoover, Head of the F. B. I.,is almost certain if the Democrats win the election this year. And it is assumedthey naturally will, as always.Madaline Baynes was taken in by some sort of advertising for school teachersand decided to be one. While she was in college, she discovered a new way to shootpaper wads without getting caught. She teaches this along with typing at E. H. S.Poor Naomi must have had it in the head when she -oook this post at the E. H. S.Mad House. She now has a whole herd of little hoodlums who all know the Baynes systemof shooting paper wads. She has developed a system of punishment similar to that usedby the German Gestapo during the Second World War.After being wounded by a Baynes model paper wad and getting more embarrassed atevery birthday, Miss Harding decided to retire and catch some poor helpless, unsuspecting bachelor. She decided to try England first and she happened to get just what shewanted—a man. His name is Sir Harry, and he hails from the House of Pontiac, in alittle town named Fourdore.Like most of the other Hrls, Mary Elizabeth Tapp left school with a glint in hereyes that has forecast the downfall of many poor helpless bachelors. Mary has a littletrouble getting her hook into her man, however, and had to wait two years, for her trapto be sprung. (I wont mention his name because he may worry). She made this poorcreature work like a dog, throwing him out of bed every morning at three and hitchinghim to a plow. She now has thirteen kids which she considers a lucky number but herhusband doesnt call it lucky.Phillip Patrick, after drifting from one job to another, decided to get into anexciting business. He saw a bill-board advertising a hell-driving show and his mechanical mind started clanking. He didnt need a great deal of practice because of hisinability to drive. He made a big splash in this business and has one customer whonever misses a show—Estel Sparks, famous Ellettsville undertaker.One of the most famous farmers of 1969 is Squire Dallas Pfaff. He owns most ofOwen County and rents land to many young farmers who are just starting out as he didin 19ii9. He has one of the most respected reputations in the town of Ellettsville. Hehas not missed a single bull session at the Peedle Acuff Barber Shop in Ellettsvillein eighteen years.Betty Roberts never dreamed of owning the Bell Telephone Company when she graduated but went to work as if she were a beaver with a hot foot. Her progress was slowbut as sure as a catapillar tractor. Before she was aware of it, she was mingling withthe big wheels of the companyj and soon she was sitting in on board meetings—right onthe same board with the president. Because of her keen business ability, she was soonelected president of this corporation. The first thing she did was to have a telephoneput in her own home in the fashionable section of town—Vinegar Hill.Rosemary McKinney3 one ambition at the time of graduation was to marry Jack Holler,whether by hook or by crook. With this in mind, she started preparing her trap early inhigh school. 3y the time he was twenty, poor Jack knew he was lost; so he answered yeswhen she proposed. Now Rosemary is one of them society dames who gets drunk everv nighton champagne while poor Jack sings to bobby soxers for a living.22
Source:	http://cdm17129.contentdm.oclc.org/cdm/ref/collection/hs-ellettsvil/id/1074
Collection:	Ellettsville High School

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