Harmony School, 1997, Page 56

Description:	TIPS FOR PERFORMERS: Playing cards have the top half upside down to help cheaters. Thereare a finite number of jokes in the universe. Singing is a trick to get people to listento music for longer than they would ordinarily. There is no music in space. People willpay to watch people make sounds. Everything on stage should be larger than in real life.LIFE ON EARTH: Men like pastries, women like custards. Scientists have invented a lovedrug, but it only works on bugs. Animals like earthquakes, tornadoes, and volcanicactivity. Nuclear weapons can wipe out life on Earth, if used properly. People lookridiculous when they’re in ecstasy. LIVING WITH OIHER PEOPLE: Violence on televisiononly affects children whose parents act like television personalities. Table manners arefor people who have nothing better to do. Civilization is a religion. Civilized peoplewalk funny. There is always a party going on somewhere. People will remember you betterif you always wear the same outfit. HIE SPACE PEOPLE: Space People read our mail. TheSpace People think that IV News programs are comedies, and that soap operas are the news.The Space People will contact us when they can make money by doing so. The Space Peoplethink factories are musical instruments. They sing along with them. Each song lasts from8 a.m. to 5 p.m. No music on weekends. MONEY: People will do odd things if you givethem money. When everything is worth money, then money is worth nothing. If you keepyour money in your shoe, then people will know which bills are yours. If you crumple yourmoney into little balls, it will never stick together. The best way to touch money is bythe edges. U.S. money is the worst looking money in the world. WORLD TRAVEL: Passportpictures are what people really look like. Rich people will travel great distances tolook at poor people. Toast is the national dish of Australia. People never travel tolook at flat landscapes. People would rather watch things than eat. Looking at postcards1$ better than looking at the real thing. Looking up is as scary as looking down. IN THEFUTURE: In the future, women will have breasts all over. In the future, it will be arelief to find a place without culture. In the future, plates of food will have names andtitles. In the future, we will all drive standing up. In the future, love will be taughton television and by listening to pop songs. WORK: Crime is a job. Sex is a job.Growing up is a job. School is a job. Going to parties is a job. Religion is a job.Being creative is a job. GROWING UP: Drugs affect children the opposite way they affectadults. Adults think with their mouths openTa Iking Heads (Stop Making Sense)
Source:	http://cdm17129.contentdm.oclc.org/cdm/ref/collection/hs-harmony/id/1122
Collection:	Harmony School

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