isa-normaladvance-1909-00229

Description:	THE NORMAL ADVANCE229if I get him out, and the thermometer is verylow when I cant put up a good talk. Whereare you traveling?Going to Little Rock.Do you live there?Yes.Perhaps you might be of some service tome. What business are you in?I am the Governor.—Ex.AWFULLY QUEER.Queer, isnt it Whats queer?Why, the night falls Yes.—but it doesnt break.And the day breaks Yes.—but it doesnt fall. And he was gone.WHY SHE WAS CHANGED.A little girl in Knoxville, Tenn., asked thefamily whether they had not noticed recentlythat she had a different and a very sweet expression. They said: Perhaps so, but whatwould be the reason? She replied: Well,thoughts of Jesus, and then the new way I domy hair.—Delineator.HISTORY IN THE VERNACULAR.A father of a Trinity school scholar of 12said to his boy :Arthur, what are you reading?History.What part?That old chestnut about revolution.What was it all about, anyhow?A British King tried to play horse with usand we just put it all over him.A poor lady the other day hastened to thenursery and said to her little daughter:Minnie, what do you mean by shouting andscreaming? Play quietly, like Tommy. See, hedoesnt make a sound.Of course he doesnt, said the little girl.That is our game. He is papa coming homelate, and I am you.—Ex.CAINS WIFE.I never discuss marriage, said the lateGeneral Fitzhugh Lee, without thinking of anold colored preacher in my State who was addressing his dark-skinned congregation, whena white man arose in the back part of the building. Mr. Preacher, said the white man, you aretalking about Cain, and you say he got marriedin the land of Nod, after he killed Abel. Butthe Bible mentions only Adam and Eve asbeing on earth at that time. Who, then, didCain marry?The colored preacher snorted with unfeigned contempt. Huh! he said, you heardat, bredderen an sisters ? You hear dot foolquestion I am axed? Cain, he went to de lando Nod just as de Good Book tells us, an soin de land o Nod Cain gits so lazy an so shif-less dat he up an marries a gal o one o demno count pore white trash families dat de inspired apostle didnt consider fittin to mentionin de Holy Word.—Everybodys Magazine.NOT A COMPETITOR.He (at the reception)—Dont you thinkthat young lady standing near the piano is abeauty?She (coldly)—Oh, I dont know. Do youknow her?He—Yes she is Mrs. Merwin—a bride ofa week.She (sweetly)—Ah! Now that I see herfrom another point of view, she is beautiful.Tommy—Pop, what is an egotist?Tommys Pop—An egotist, my son, is anyman who thinks he is better than we are.—Philadelphia Record.
Source:	http://indstate.contentdm.oclc.org/cdm/ref/collection/isuarchive/id/34259
Collection:	Indiana State University Archives

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